Aku, Duri

「Karena duri tidak akan pernah tahu sakitnya tertusuk」-a friend-

Tak sedetikpun terpikir,
aku, duri,
mencoba menyakiti.

Aku, duri,
hanya lindungi diri,
lindungi hati.

Karena kami lelah tersakiti.
Kami muak terlukai.

Aku, duri,
aku tak ingin menyakiti,
tak berniat melukai.

Keping Memori

Mata ini tak henti
menatap kenang yang perlahan terkikis
remang cahaya pagi hari.
Sepi.
Dan debu memori terhembus angin.

Aroma gerimis
saat air mata ini menitik
masih terekam rapi.
Hening.
Tak satupun terselip
keluar dari genggam jemari.
Ironi.

Munafik, aku, kamu, kalian!!!

Kata tercerai berai menjadi pedih.
Tertelan tenggorok berjejal perih.

Bibir tak pula diam terkunci.
Terselip caci,
berteman iri,
dihias dengki,
yang berlari dari nyata yang rusak terusik,
dari fitnah yang telah terbisik,
dari bual yang menggelitik.

Lidah teriris tersayat keji.
Tanpa sadar telinga terbalut tak mendengar lagi.
Mata dibutakan emosi,
terbasuh kalimat dangkal berpeluk belati.

Tertatih,
terkikis,
mati.

Silent Whisper (3)

It’s been months yet 

I feel that nothing changes. 

Something inside me still struggling 

with something 

that I’m afraid isn’t there.

I start thinking that I 

become smaller that I used to be. 

This heart is withering. 

I unconsciously 

started to avoid people again; 

afraid that world will hurt me again; 

afraid that I have to endure pains again.

This insecurity is killing me every day. 

But I don’t know why I should feel like this. 

I love my family, my friends.

It feels like my heart 

is about to bursting. 

There are too much unknown emotions 

that fill my chest. 

It hurts.

Why do I feel like people starts 

walk away from me?

When did I become this 

pathetic?

The Weight of Silence

I'm hurting,

even in my sleep I'm crying...

I'm hurting me!

Stabbed myself in the heart and bleeding badly,

over and over again

until it's drying

until it's dead...

What do you know about me?

You know nothing...

You don't know that every lie that I've said

is ripped me apart,

torn my skin inch by inch,

took my breath second by second...

You said you're hurting...

So will you try to be me?

Will you try to endure all the pains I feel?

Will you?

Will you able to keep those pains by yourself?

Of course

I'm laughing...

But do you know whom I laughing at?

MYSELF!!!

For being this cruel,

for being this weak,

for being

me...

Sorry (Dear Daddy) - by f(x)

Forgive me if I possibly hurt your feelings today. 

My immature self just said immature things. 

If you possibly can’t understand my feelings, it’s fine. 

No need for excuses, 

It’s all my fault.

Even if you don’t say everyone knows, 

both your eyes are immersed with tears. 

Sorry, so sorry. This is my heart. 

You know the day I’ve opened up my heart, 

I’ll do better. 

Sorry. (Sorry) I’m sorry. (Sorry) I can’t say anything other than this.

You can still hate me for your sorrowful feelings. 

There’s no need for any expressions. 

To me you’ll be here forever.

Even if you don’t say everyone knows, 

both your eyes are immersed with tears. 

Sorry, so sorry. This is my heart. 

You know the day I’ve opened up my heart, 

I’ll do better. 

Sorry. (Sorry) I’m sorry. (Sorry) I can’t say anything other than this. 

I can’t do anything other than this. 

I can’t imagine a world without you.
Although I’m lacking and deficient, 

I love you. 

Even if you don’t say everyone knows, 

both your eyes are immersed with tears. 

Sorry, so sorry. This is my heart. 

You know the day I’ve opened up my heart, 

I’ll do better. 

Sorry. (Sorry) I’m sorry. (Sorry) I can’t say anything other than this, yeah. 

Sorry, sorry. So hard to say I’m sorry. 

Sorry, I’m sorry. I can’t say anything other than this.

Source: [Lyric] F(x) – Sorry (Hangul+Rom+English Translation) | ~Come to My New World :: Kyu-Teuk Shipper~

Midnight Reflection

The dream is fleeting and when it sees the pain for everything,
in whom you can believe, is only yourself

the GazettE - Remember the Urge

BELIEVE

I need determination

A big one

cause I start to doubt myself for hundred times

cause my faith even wavering from desperation

I think I despise myself too much

so I try to run

become someone who isn't me

say words that I don't even mean to

do something that I can't take the responsibility of

Can I still believe in myself?